I screwed up bad. I cheated on my boyfriend of two years with my coworker. It wasn’t like an ongoing thing, but one night after coworker and I went to happy hour. When I told my boyfriend about it, he was pissed. He even broke up with me for a minute. A few weeks ago though, he decided to give us another chance. We are trying to work on us, but now he’s demanding I quit my job. He doesn’t want me around coworker, which I get. However, I like my job. If I love my boyfriend but really like my job what do I do?
-I Blew It
I recently started dating someone last year and we are thinking about taking our relationship to the next step and moving in together. My partner has had a very sexual past and he’s slept with just about every male friend he has had for the sake of just sexual pleasure. He assures me he is a changed person and no longer wants anything to do with any of that and I believe him. However, I have not met these friends and I know I eventually will because some of them are his best friends. Now, I am not a person who puts a huge amount of importance on sex, I know everyone has a past, however, a big part of me is upset that I can’t even have this intimacy of sex between us because I know all of his male friends have had a piece of him already and if put in a position where I’d have to meet these people, I’d feel like a clown. How do I approach this? It’s really having me second guess our relationship.
I have a question for you because I’m trying to see if I’m in the wrong or if this guy I’m talking to is just doing the most. Long story short, we’ve been dating for literally one month and he got pissed at me because he found out I was talking to someone else. He randomly asked me two nights ago, and I just told him. I like him the most so far and could see myself being in a relationship with him someday in the future, but the other man is someone I enjoy talking to. Since I’m not in a committed relationship with either one at the moment, I don’t see the problem with dating them both, or more. I’m single.
I apologized to him for hurting his feelings, but he was still upset. Before you ask me, I wouldn’t be mad if I found out he was talking to other people, because we aren’t official.
So am I right to feel the way I do?
I have been dating my guy for 7 months now. He has been divorced for about 2 years (same for me). He hasn’t introduced me to his 3 adult kids – all over 18. I brought it up and he said he was very nervous and wasn’t sure of his kids reacting. He’s a good man yet sensitive and with no backbone. This really bothers me as he has met everyone on my side (I have no kids) but he has met my entire family. How long should I wait and should I walk away should he wouldn’t introduce me? Thanks so much.
I’m tired of my judgmental ass friend. I mean I love how he’s protective of me, and has always been a ride or die, but for the past few months he has been making slick comments about my personal life. So about three months ago, my boyfriend and I decided to become a throuple with a great guy we both liked. The arrangement we have is really good, and I’m happy. You’d think my happiness is what my best friend would care about, but it’s not.
When I first told him about my situation, he told me it was a terrible idea. He said he couldn’t do it, and that it’s going to end badly with me single. I tried to explain to him that me and my boyfriends are good, but he believes this won’t work. I told him that I didn’t want to hear any more of that negative sh$t, and for a short while that worked. But then when I’d bring both boyfriends around him, he would be real shady to them. And when it’s just he and I, he asks messy questions like “who you like better?”, “who would you marry since you want a husband and legally can only have one?” Stuff like that.
I love my friend but what do I do about his judgment? It’s getting to the point where I thought about slapping his a$$.
-Keep Your Judgement
I’m sick of my so-called friends getting on my case about who I date. They’re always cracking jokes about the fact most of the men I date are older than me. See I’m 23, but most of the guys I mess with or whatever are at least 40. They don’t get the attraction, but guys my age have that immature mentality, and I don’t have time. I’ve told my friends my reasoning several times, but they won’t ease up. The jokes didn’t bother me that much before, but now I’m sick of them saying sh&t like I like raisin balls. It’s petty and stupid. How would you get them to stop? What would you do if you were me?
-I Like Real Daddies
How do you know if someone really is feeling you or not? I’ve been flirting with this guy on Twitter for about 2 months now, and that flirting hasn’t gone anywhere. I mean we haven’t exchanged numbers and haven’t gone on a date. Nothing. But he’s always liking my posts, and he always responding to my DMs. I want to ask him what’s up, but I don’t want to put myself out there like that. So knowing that, how do I figure out if he likes me?
I’m a long time fan and I need some advice. A relationship with a friend of mine that I love so much is damned near dead. I call this man my brother. Two years ago we used to live together and there was this guy that he was “dealing” with. Unbeknown to me I was messaging my friend’s “guy” on a dating app. I didn’t know him, he didn’t know me. This guy, nor myself, had no picture shown; I had only seen a d!<% pic of him in private messages, and my location was blurred at that time on the app so I never knew when he would be in the house.
On top of that my friend and I would make sure we never saw who the other was dealing with in the house by making sure we stayed in our rooms when company was entering and leaving the home. I did not know until the “guy” asked me did I live on a certain street on the app. Initially I thought to myself “who is this n!&&@ tryna play me”. But then I thought about it and thought that this may be my friend’s “guy”. Absentmindedly, I messaged the “guy” saying that I do live where he asked and that I thought he may have just chilled with my roommate. As soon as I sent the message I blocked him in an attempt for the “guy” to not get that message. I felt that if I was going to ask that question it should be to my friend and not to a person he may or may not have been dealing with.
I then went to my roommate/friend and asked him if the guy I had been talking to was the man he was dealing with. He said yes. My former roommate and I then came up with a game plan for us not to run into the same men online and we moved forward, or so I thought. About a week later my friend texts me and states that he got a different story about how everything happened and that him and I “had problems now”. I was confused. I later found out that the message I had attempted to block from being sent did in fact go through and that the “guy” responded. My friend/roommate was livid with me. I tried explaining what happened but he never believed me. The situation was so bad that I ended up moving out earlier than anticipated because of the tension in the house.
Well…eventually we got through it. We started hanging out again but my friend now has a boundary and perception of me that I believe is unfair. He will not allow me to be in the company of any of his friends or family members because he believes that I have the capability of sleeping with his love interests or causing unnecessary drama within his circle. He has stated that there were certain points in this “guy’s” and mine interaction that should have been cut off sooner being his friend. I think it’s f#< up because I never have or would sleep with a friend’s love interest. I also think this isn’t right because I was speaking to a nameless, faceless profile. Again, I never knew who this person was until they approached me about my location. I feel like I’m being judged off of a situation that anybody gay living with another gay person could have slipped into due to technology and not having boundaries around it.
My question is this: how do I continue a friendship with someone having these perceptions of me? Should I just go? I really don’t want to leave this friend behind but it’s difficult knowing that someone you call a friend, a brother, believes that you are a slut who is capable of betrayal. Please help.
– The Friend He Thinks Is a Slut
I feel low. My sister has this friend who I’ll call Ari for the sake of this letter. The weekend before Thanksgiving we all went to another friend’s Friendsgiving, and that’s where I met Ari’s new boyfriend. I’ll admit that when I first saw him, I thought he was fine fine. But because he’s Ari man and I thought he was “straight” I just let it go. Unfortunately, the liquor kept flowing that night and this guy kept flirting with me on the low, and I’ll admit I kept flirting with him. Nothing happened that night.
A week after Friendsgiving, I get a new friend and DM on Instagram. This guy sent me the one message telling me it was nice to meet me and that I should add him on Snapchat. Snapchat is where it popped off. The messages we exchanged got flirty again, and that’s when we started sending pics back and forth. Once I saw the meat, I knew I was going to forget about Ari, and that’s what happened. We agreed he’d come over and we had sex. It was good too. At least that’s what I thought.
Since that night we hooked up, I haven’t heard from him. He hasn’t responded to my messages on Snapchat, and the message he sent on Instagram has been removed by him. He ghosted me. Not only do I feel a way about him disappearing on me, but I feel so damn guilty for sleeping with my sister’s friend’s man. Ari is cool, and even though she’s my sister’s bff, I’m friends with her too. I want to tell my sister about what happened and even Ari, because I feel they should know what kind of man this guy is. But I don’t know. What do you think?
My boyfriend won’t have sex with me. We started dating back in July, and he still won’t let me top him. I knew he was celibate when we first started talking, but he said he was waiting until he got back into a relationship. I asked if he wanted to be official or whatever last week, and he still says he’s not ready for sex. Like what is a man to do? I have needs. We’ve talked about this, and my boyfriend said he still isn’t ready. I feel like he’s holding out for the hell of it. Advice needed.
-I Wants It