The Guy in His DM Is Causing Our Relationship Problems

I have been with my boyfriend for almost 4 years. We spoke about moving in together this upcoming August. We never had a real argument until last June. He went to a guy’s party (he told me he was going to a party but didn’t tell me who it was). I found out the guy who had the party was a guy who went into my boyfriend’s DM and was flirting with him. I found out who the guy was by snooping. I confronted him and told him I didn’t feel comfortable with him going. Long story short, he still went even though he knew I was uncomfortable. Today 5/19 I found out they are still talking. The guy posted on my bf birthday picture saying he wish he could celebrate with him. Now I feel some type of way that they still talking. I also feed disrespected due to the fact one of our only argument was about this guy and it seems like it doesn’t matter to him.


Dating, relationships

I’m Having Insecurities in a Relationship with a Former “Hoe”

Dear Tavion,

I came across your content on Instagram, and I loved it. You say some good stuff that’s definitely on point. The question I have for you today is about hoeing. I’ve been dating this guy for about two months, and recently we decided to become exclusive. I really like him. Like a lot. He’s almost my dream guy. He’s fine, financially stable, great body, funny, and we have a lot in common.  The problem is, I think he used to be a huge hoe. Scratch that, I know he used to be a hoe.  In so many words, he kind of said that.

At first I didn’t care about his past as much, because it was his past and everyone has one, including me. However, I think his past is bothering me now because when we go out to spots it seems he always knows someone, and the someone is usually a person he has hooked up with apparently. Plus, we follow each other on Instagram and every time he posts a selfie or something, I look at his comments and a part of me becomes insecure. I hate that because I’m not an insecure person. So I guess my actual question, is what do I do? How do I stay in this relationship and not drive myself crazy.


Mr. Worried but Not Worried


Is It OK to Message My MCM?

Hey T,

Quick and simple question.  Do you think it’s a bad idea to inbox your MCM?  My friends think if I were to do it, that I’m being super thirsty.  But I don’t seem the harm.  Not like I’m sending nudes or anything.  Thoughts?

-One Life to Live


“It Goes Down in the DM”

Hey T,

Love the site.  I check out your posts from time to time, and like what you have to say.  Actually hoping you can help me.  I came across this guy on Instagram, and think he is so fine.  Smile, body, and height are all topnotch.  Based on his posts, he seems to be real cool.  Of course I’ve liked more than a few of his pics, and recently he’s been liking mine.  Well I want to reach out to him, but I don’t want to come off thirsty.  Plus, I’m sure folks are throwing themselves at him all the time.  What would you do? I mean if you were me.


Want Him