Personal Revelations

Intimate Convos with Tavion: Why First Dates are NOT for You, the Boo, and His Crew

Happy Friday Eve folks.  I hope today is full of positive vibes for all as we are one day closer to the weekend.  I thought I’d take the opportunity today to revive something I haven’t done in a while.  And that’s Intimate Conversations with Tavion.  I haven’t given you all a campfire story in a month of Sundays, so you all are long overdue.  My story for this Thursday is in regards to why I don’t believe your first date with a guy should include his friends.


If People Can Change, Why Can’t I Try to Change My Man?


Was at brunch with the crew about a week ago, and we had an interesting convo.  Now I don’t know if it was interesting because the mimosas were flowing or what, but it’s a question I present to you.  If we as humans believe that people can change, then why is it so far stretched for me to date a good looking guy with bad habits and expect to be able to change him into my dream man?  I mean my friends said there is nothing wrong with being with a seven because he will probably treat you right.  But I want a ten, and to be able to mold him into a ten on the inside to match.  You know what I’m trying to say?  Looking forward to reading what you have to say.

-I Want Tens

Dating, relationships

5 Things to Know Before You Jump into Cuffing Season

I know there are more important things on the horizon like the upcoming presidential election in a few weeks, but I’d like to point out that cuffing season is also quickly approaching. If you don’t know what I’m talking about, allow me to explain.  For all intent and purposes, the infamous cuffing season is like hibernation season for bears (real ones LOL).  When the cold weather hits, bears like to find them a cozy and intimate place, away from other aspects of nature.  Similarly during cuffing season, humans don’t like going to clubs and bars like they used to in the spring and summer, because of the winter air and its elements.  While humans like to be in a cozy and intimate place, they tend to want to be there with a warm body next to them, as in a boo.  A bae. A honey.  A boyfriend.  And I’m all here for people participating in cuffing season, but I just think there are rules to this.


“Invented Sex”…How Do You Know if You’re Good in the Bedroom?


When I was hanging with my friend and cousin, the topic of sex came up.  In our drunken convo, we were talking about how to know if you’re good in bed.  I mean my cousin was basically like you just know.  Either you got it or you don’t.  My friend on the other hand said you can tell if you’re good at sex, based on the reaction of your partners.  However, I raised point that people lie.  A guy may moan, and tell you that you are amazing in the moment, but he could be lying.  I’ve had bad sexual experiences with a guy or two, and acted like it was great, just so I didn’t hurt their feelings.  So again, how do you know if you’ve got that good, good?

-I Wanna Know


Being with a Relative’s Old One Night Stand

Hey T,

How would you feel if you found out a dude you are vibing with was actually with your cousin a few years back?  I’ve been talking to this guy for about 6 weeks, and last weekend my cousin came to visit me while he was on Spring Break. Well when I introduced my cousin to this guy, my cousin was acting a little weird.  So when the two of us got back to my place, my cousin dropped the bomb that he and this man, who I really like by the way, had slept together back at Miami Sizzle last year.  When I asked the guy about it, he confirmed it.  However, they both agree that it was a one-time thing.  But now I’m confused what I’m supposed to do. I don’t want to be involved with someone that smashed my cousin. Thoughts?

Too Close to Home


Is This Man Flirting With Me?

Hi T,

I read your reply to the question about being outed in college or whatever, and I thought what you said was pretty dope.  I thought maybe you could give me some good advice too.  See there is this guy on campus who happens to be in two of my classes this semester.  He is real cool, and we are actually in a study group together.  Well the other night, the other people in our group left me and this boy in the library, and the two of us just chilled and talked for hours.  I think he was flirting with me, but I’m not sure.  I’m attracted to the guy, and I would like to hang out with him in a more date like situation, but I don’t want to put myself out there in case he’s just cool people and not gay.  What do you think?


College Chronicles

Dating, relationships

My Boyfriend Has a Sex Tape Online…What to Do?

Dear T,

I’ve been seeing this guy for about a month now, and everything was going great.  But a few days ago he told me something that has got me really questioning a future with him.   He told me that a year ago he and his boyfriend of the time made a sex video, and that the video is somewhere on the tube.  I tried to play it cool when he told me, but I’m kind of freaking out.  I don’t know if I can make someone bae, when bae has spread his cheeks for the world to see.  I tried looking for the video but can’t find it, and he didn’t tell me the title of it.  I didn’t really ask either I guess.  So what advice do you have for me T?  Could use some.

-Surprised Dater


Adele Has Me in My Feelings

Hi T,

Believe it or not, that new Adele song has had me thinking lately about my ex-boyfriend.  Despite the fact that we broke up 4 months ago, and we both have started dating other people, the song made me realize I still love him and didn’t get closure after the breakup.  Don’t get me wrong, I don’t want to get back together with him or anything.  But I’m just saying.  Actually, I guess I don’t know what I’m saying.  Guess I’m asking you to help me make sense of my emotions.


Hello 88


The Modern Day “Bug A Boo”

So T,

Is it normal for a guy now a days to be so demanding of your time, if you two have just been on a few dates?  I’ve been seeing this really sweet man for the last couple of weeks, and he texts me a lot, if not calling, to get a status update about my day, or to get to know me.  At first I thought this was cute, because it was nice to feel wanted and chased.  But now, I’m a little annoyed by the constant communication.  I tried to slow the texts and calls down by not responding to every message, but he’ll just send a duplicate message or “wyd” text if I don’t reply.  In my head I want to scream at him to chill out.  But I don’t know if this is what dating is about these days.  Haven’t been in dating world in years due to a relationship, which I recently ended.  Anyway, thoughts would be appreciated.

Yours Truly,

Tryna Date

Dating, relationships

Should I Try to Get Him Back

Hello T,

I don’t know how to begin this without crying, but my boyfriend and I recently broke up and it is due to the fact that I won’t top for him. When we first started dating I expressed how I was worried that he was a vers and I am afraid that I wouldn’t be able to please him.  He had stated that he loved our sex and that I shouldn’t worry.

The thing that makes it so hard is that we met each other’s parents, and other important people in our lives. We had plans for the future and now they have all gone down the drain.

I want to call him and tell him that I will do it, that I don’t want to give up on us, but what happens when I do it and he still is not satisfied? Will be right back to this point? I don’t want to act upon being freshly single. Please help.

Once Again Single