Dating, relationships, The Lifestyle

Be a Top’s kind of Bottom, and A Bottom’s Kind of Top.

Dear T,

I’m just starting to try this whole gay thing out, and I was wondering if you could offer me some tips.  I’ve been in a two month long relationship, and have yet to have sex.  As I prepare to take that step with my boyfriend, I’m seeking some advice.  Like what advice would you offer to someone that wants to be a great bottom?  And actually, what advice would you offer to someone that wants to be a great top?  I think I have an interest in being versatile.

Thanks for the help,

Gay Virgin96

Hello there Gay Virgin96,

I appreciate you taking the time to write to me.  I’m glad you have been able to accept yourself for who you are.  It’s never too late for one to accept himself as gay.  Now let me get straight to the point.  Below, I have included a list for what makes a good bottom great, and what it takes for a regular top to be fantastic. As always, I’ll try to keep my response brief yet informative.

Bottoms Up!  What It Takes to Make You Great?

  1. Cleanliness is really a must. No one wants a stinky bottom or a painting one.  Before you engage in a bedtime session, make sure you fleet. Purchase an enema from your local grocery store, pharmacy, Walmart, or Target.  Before you use the enema, pour out the actual contents of the bottle.  You shouldn’t frequently use the products in these enema bottles as long term use can cause some damage to your body.  So again, pour out the contents of bottle and fill with warm water instead.  Then follow the directions on the enema box.  Make sure you repeat the process until what comes out of your rear is nothing but clear water.   After your last “rinse cycle,” take the bottle and put a little liquid soap and warm water in it, then do one more rinse.  Choose whatever fragrant soap you prefer.
  1. One more thing about cleanliness. When you get into the shower and wash up after your “rinse cycle” process, make sure you hit all spots of your body.  Put some liquid soap on your index finger and rub around and slightly in your hole.  Then rinse.  This is something I do to stay on the safe side.  In fact, after you think you are clean take your finger and wipe back there, then smell it.  If you smell something other than soap, you have some more cleaning to do.
  1. If you and your boyfriend have plans to engage in a romantic evening, know what your stomach can handle throughout the day. Try not to eat any food that you know your stomach will have issues with, and could potentially muddy your waters for the evening.  I recommend staying away from foods high in fiber and cheese.
  1. Don’t be a lazy bottom. You laying on your stomach and just “taking it,” doesn’t make you a bottom, it makes you an available hole.  So be willing to try different positions, and don’t be afraid to work out and sweat.
  1. Remember to breathe out when your boyfriend inserts his piece. If it’s your first time, it most likely will be a bit painful.  You may want to try Anal Eaze.  It helps numb your hole a bit, to lessen the pain.

To Be Top Dog

  1. Again, cleanliness is important. No one wants to put their face in a man’s crotch area, and it smells like cottage cheese or gym sweat. So in addition to taking your regular shower, make sure you take some soap and a towel or luffa, and clean your penis and sac.  And please hit those two gaps between your junk and thighs.
  1. Don’t be a lazy top. Don’t expect the bottom to put in all the work and do all the sweating.  As a top, you need to be willing to get in there and get a workout too.
  1. If the bottom is willing to slurp your fun stick, DON’T you dare refuse to eat his hole. As long as it’s clean and he wants you too, as a top take that tongue and go to work.  Besides, you “eating” will more than likely really turn on the bottom, and help the bottom’s hole to relax so he is better able to take the peen.
  1. Be confident in what you have. So what if you don’t have 9 or 10 inches, most men actually don’t, and that’s medical fact.  Take pride in what you have, and develop an amazing stroke.
  1. And personally, I prefer fleeting even when planning to top. I may not be as thorough with the process as I would be prepping to bottom; but, sex on a full stomach is so uncomfortable in my opinion.

Going forward here are my suggestions.

  1. Don’t engage in sex until you are absolutely ready.
  1. Make sure the first time is romantic by your standards. If you don’t find the back of a Tahoe romantic, then don’t do it there.

As always, nothing but love,


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8 thoughts on “Be a Top’s kind of Bottom, and A Bottom’s Kind of Top.”

  1. lifeasagaymom says:

    This was awesome to read. Such good advice for the young lads!! Lol

    1. According To T says:

      Thanks so much for that. Please make sure you check out my other blog posts. And have an awesome rest of your day.

  2. Gay virgin96 says:

    Thank you so much for being thorough. Folks tell you to clean but you went in lol

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