Pop Culture, relationships

My Boyfriend is White, and Doesn’t Get Why I’m So Mad

Dear T,

While I love my man, we’ve recently come into a problem I’m not sure how to feel about. In light of what’s been happening with Gucci and Prada and their blackface controversies, my boyfriend and I recently had a conversation about it. Before I go any further you should know that I’m black and my boyfriend is white. The reason I guess that matters is because he basically told me he understands white people dressing in blackface is wrong, and he would never do it, but thought people may be overreacting to Gucci and Prada designs. He thinks the companies had designers who were just designing, and had no racist intentions behind their designs.

I responded to him by telling him that may be true, but that doesn’t negate the fact that the designs are offensive. I told him the black community has every right to be offended and boycott the labels. He responded that not everything has to be about black and white, which really pissed me off. As much as I love my boyfriend, I’m disappointed in his attitude about this. He’s not racist clearly, but damn it. Even though we agreed to disagree, I’m still salty. I guess the question I have is how do I get him to see that what Gucci and Prada did is a big deal? Heck, how do I now not look at him differently?

Thanks,

Mike & Ike 95

Dating, Pop Culture, relationships

Is It Colorism, Just a Dating Preference, or Both?

The conversation about colorism and people’s dating preferences is certainly NOT new. Black folks and other people of color have been talking about skin color and sexual attraction for generations. While I’m a firm believer that beauty exists across the spectrum of black and brown, I’ve witnessed my fair share of individuals with a “skewed” perception of attractiveness. Those people that are firm believers in the “light is right” mantra. They believe that being light-skinned grants a person an automatic qualification of beautiful, and that those of a darker tone have got to have some damn near flawless features in order to compete. And while people are ready to blast those that have a preference for the Halle Berry and Michael Ealy folks of the world, perhaps the offended should give those attracted to our lighter brothers and sisters a break.

Pop Culture

Why History Has Shown Us to Expect the Rise of Anti-Gay Laws

With the rash of state legislatures eager to pass bills that clearly disenfranchise members of the LGBT community, I thought I’d take the opportunity to call BS.  While I’m disgusted by the legislative actions of states like North Carolina, Mississippi, and almost Georgia, I can’t say I’m all that surprised. History in the U.S. has countless examples of what happens when this country finally takes steps toward equality for all.

Pop Culture

Stopping Donald Trump

So in the past week, I’ve been reminded of a major reason why Trump is seemingly so popular.  The ignorance that he spews from his platform, preys on the very fears and ignorance many in America have.  His “othering” of Muslims, condemnation of Mexicans and Mexican Americans, and belittlement of women, strikes a chord with the apparent millions of people that treat minorities as a scapegoat for all the turmoil in this country.

Pop Culture

Firing Off Friday: Black Lives Matter

Happy Friday folks,

Welcome to another rendition of Firing Off Friday.  This week I think I’m actually going to touch on the Black Lives Matter movement.  Up until now, I haven’t said a whole lot about it.  And that’s not because I don’t support it, but rather I didn’t know how to gather my frustrations to put into a post.  I’m still not sure I do, but at least I’m going to try and make an attempt.  So forgive me if my thoughts bounce from A to B rather quickly.