Dating

Fitness Or Romance? Should I Tell Him I Like Him?

Hi T!

I just recently found your blog and really liked your advice so I figured I’d ask you for some! I have a crush on one of my martial arts instructors and am dying over it. We share a lot of interests and get along really well. He seems to treat me a little differently and I don’t know if it’s because we’re friends or what. We’ve known each other for 5 months now and see each other 5/6 days a week. I’m extremely hesitant to even hint at asking him out because I don’t want to fuck up what we’re currently vibing with.

The few times we’ve been out in a group he gave me a hug (he doesn’t like touching people/people touching him and he initiated the hugs each time). The time we went out to a bar with some others from our studio, I had alcohol for the first time ever, and he babysat me.  He made sure I drank lots of water, let me rest my head on his shoulder, and walked me out to my uber.

I know he’s currently single. He told me he bragged to his brother and his soon-to-be sister-in-law when he took some of the treats I made home for them to try and boasted about being able to have my treats weekly.  I know he swings my way, I’m AFAB non-binary, and after I casually mentioned I was nb he asked for my pronouns so as not to make me uncomfortable.

I’m just so torn between saying nothing and enjoying what we’ve got going.  Or asking him out and possibly fucking things up. I like him and our studio and everyone there. It would suck if I said or did anything to make him uncomfortable or make things between us awkward.

Should I just say ‘screw it’ and ask him out? Or bite my tongue?

Thank you! <3

-Martial Arts Admirer