Dating, relationships

I Landed My Gym Crush, and Now I’m a Little Disappointed


What do you do when you finally land your crush and it’s not what you thought it would be? Getting straight to the point, before this whole corona thing popped off, I had a crush on this guy who I’m now dating. For about three months, I would see him at the gym when I went and would find myself so damn thirsty. He has body. So towards the end of January, I finally listened to my friends and spoke with him. And from then on, I got to know more about him and found he was cool. We’ve been dating, have some amazing sex, but there’s an issue with our conversations. I feel like our conversations aren’t great.

We talk about working out, sports, and Marvel movies a lot. Initially that was cool, but when I want to talk politics, or Bravo shows, or cultural issues, or other types of movies, our conversations are a little blah. And maybe because all this quarantining has us spending more and more time together, but I’m a little bothered by our limited talks. Not sure if I’m making a big deal out of nothing or if I was a bit shallow in trying to date him. Not sure if there is a question in there, but I’m sure you can find it.

Blinded by the Muscles


I Slept with My Personal Trainer and It Wasn’t Good… Now What?

Dear T,

I check out your blog from time to time and really like what you have to say.  I especially like what you had to say about messing around with your personal trainer. That was pretty good advice.  Unfortunately, I didn’t take it.  A little less than a week ago, I went out with my trainer to grab drinks at Fridays.  One thing led to another, and we wound back to my place.  I thought the sex would be amazing. Unfortunately, all the muscles and that sexy ass smile couldn’t make up for the fact that he wasn’t that good in bed.  His equipment was decent but he didn’t have any rhythm.  Needless to say, I was disappointed.  Since that night, I have actually cancelled my sessions with him because I don’t know what to say. I just want us to go back to our training relationship and pretend like nothing happened.  That’s hard to do when he’s seen me naked and keeps texting me flirty messages. Long story short, how do I go back to normal?  Any advice here is welcomed.


Mistakenly Foolish


I Met Him at the Gym, Kissed Him, and Now Things Are Awkward!


I made a damn fool of myself with this guy I see at the gym all of the time. I joined this Gold’s Gym by me about 2 months, and about three weeks ago I noticed this man, and I mean a man.  He’s this fine thick muscle dude, with this crazy amazing smile. Anyway, I may have noticed him, but he was definitely noticing me too.  I would catch him checking me out or whatever. Recently, we even started talking. Mostly about sports and 45.

Long story short, a few days ago after I finished a workout, I went to the Sauna. Oddly enough, about five minutes later I look up and see the guy walk in and he sits down within arm’s reach.  Keep in mind there is no one in the sauna but us two.  We’re talking and laughing (sweating too because it was hot as shit in that sauna), and before you know it, I lean in for a kiss. Now I wasn’t looking at a watch or clock or anything, but I swear the kiss lasted for at least three seconds.  Even felt like he kissed me back.  But after those three seconds were up, he flips and tells me didn’t ask for that, and asks me why the hell I would do that.  After he left pissed, I left pissed and embarrassed, and haven’t gone back to the gym since.  Anyway, please tell me how to fix this situation.  Like how do I make things less awkward, or at least good enough to the point I can show my face in gym?

-Team Too Embarrassed


I Like My Personal Trainer, What Should I Do?

Hi T,

I am a female who likes another female. The only issue is that: the girl I like is my trainer and instructor of majority of the classes I take (if it was normal circumstances I would just tell her). My trainer and I are really close in the gym (including calling each other our favorites) and tend to goof off a lot. We even used to talk on snapchat A LOT outside the gym and not gym related topics. As well as following each other on intstagram. The two of us even had plans to go grab some dinner after a session. But then out of the blue she unfollows me on both forms of social media claiming that she “can’t follow clients.” (our plans were effectively canceled). That was in early December. However she acts toward me as if nothing happened. We still goof off, we still call each other favorites, etc. If anything it seems as if her behavior has gotten even more flirty: 😉 emojis in texts, letting me go into Zumba class a half hour late (when the cutoff is 10 mins), putting weights on levels she KNOWS I can’t lift and then proceeds to do most of the work just telling me to make the motion (i.e. bicep curl on the machine), randomly touching me (that’s not within a training touch), always bringing up inside jokes or making me laugh (in sessions or in classes) hell she’s always smiling and laughing around me, plays the song Closer by the Chainsmokers in Zumba cause I ask her to (and she knows I love that song), and most recently asking me to get a little bit of dust off her shoulder for her (where she could easily reach it herself). She’s even currently binge watching a show because I recommended it to her. Now if you’re thinking my trainer is girly she definitely is not. To be honest I’m like 80% sure she is into women based on the fact that she wears men’s clothing (Jordans and Tims, and men’s watches/chain necklaces included), and that she LOVES tricking out her car, but then again those are stereotypes. Now as for me I’m very girly (I identify as sexually fluid). The two of us kind of bonded over a mutual love of dance, similar music tastes, horror movies, and that we have similar personalities.

Okay now I’m rambling, it’s just I wanted you to have an ample amount of information so you can answer me. So what I’m asking is: 1.) Why would she randomly unfollow me on instagram and snapchat (she says it was nothing I did)? 2.) Is she into me? 3.) How can I know for sure without actually asking her? and 4.) How do I tell her I like her without sessions and classes being awkward?

I hope you get to this soon and thank you in advance!

Confused Gym Addict


Confidence is Sexy!

Hey T,

I’m going to try and keep this brief. Since social media has become such a big thing now, I’ve become increasingly more insecure. Men are posting pics of themselves with their rippling abs, their superman chests, their Hulk like arms, and their huge legs and butts that can crack walnuts. And then I look at me. Standing at 6’2″, weighing 240, with a medium/large build, a keg for a stomach, and a butt barely visible. Thankfully I’ve been told I have a nice smile and dimples. But honestly, how is a guy like me supposed to catch someone with mini versions of Captain America and the Black Panther walking around out here?


D.C. Marvelous