Pop Culture, The Lifestyle

5 Tips to Save You Money, Time, and Aggravation During Pride Weekend

While I know Pride Season has already technically begun, I usually don’t think it starts until DC Black Pride Weekend. Granted I might have a bias for the weekend because I’m all too familiar with the area and typical events. But, this particular pride occasion also coincides with usually warm weather and Memorial Day Weekend, so it brings all sorts of people from the LGBT spectrum out. If you’ve never been, allow me to tell you that the few days can be quite eventful.

However, the weekend can be the wrong kind of eventful under the wrong circumstances. As with all things, this particular weekend has its share of horror stories. You can probably find past participants that will claim to have been in a fight, hooked up with the wrong guy, got too drunk, lost a wallet, lost a man, and as well as been a part of a plethora of other issues.

And having myself fallen into one of the above categories, I’ve decided to give some words of advice to encourage any of you attending DC Black Pride (and really any pride this summer) to be better. Keep reading as I go over five tips to help you save money, time, and aggravation as you go out and celebrate you for being you.

Dating, relationships

Living Like You’re Single in a Long Distance Relationship

My partner and I first began our now 3 year relationship via long distance. I moved down to Atlanta from Houston to be with him full time after 1 year but we were sleeping with other people while still out of state. I’ve been here for the last 2 years and after the honeymoon phase has worn out I discovered my mood has sunken into depression and anxiety due to being away from my family and friends back in my hometown.

This is my first long term live-in relationship and first foray into living away from home altogether. I noticed that I had stepped out here and there with each trip out of town due to my feelings of unhappiness. We were now considering moving back to Houston but I recently slipped up with an ex a few months ago on a trip back to Houston that my hometown partner found out about via hacking my phone.

I’m confused if I am truly depressed about my current relationship being monogamous and feelings of being stifled domestically. Or unhappy with being away from my hometown. We recently started couple counseling and each started therapy for clarity in our emotions. Should I try to make this work or leave while the going is good?

-Needy Neurotic or Nympho

Dating

My Friends Say I’m Picky, But I Can’t Deal with this Guy’s Feet

Dear T,

Full disclosure, my friends have told me I’m picky when it comes to dating. If knowing what you do and don’t want is picky, then by all means call me picky. I just don’t think there is anything wrong with having standards. However, I told myself in 2019 I would keep my friends’ words in mind. Having said all of that let me get to the reason I’m writing you.

I’ve been seeing this guy I like for about a month now. I mean I really do like him. He checks off all the boxes on my checklist, and he’s got me completely pressed. Or he did before I recently saw his feet. The other night we were intimate and he finally took his socks off and I was horrified. I mean I’ve seen some bad feet, but his toes alone look like someone has been gnawing at them. Then when the bottom of his feet managed to touch my leg, I swore he cut me.

As much as I like this guy, I don’t think I can be with someone with bad feet. Not that I make a habit of putting toes in my mouth, but if I was in the right mood I wouldn’t even be able to remove his socks. I’m doing my best not to be picky in this situation, but damn. His feet are gross.

What are your thoughts?

-I Can’t Do His Feet

relationships

I Don’t Know If I Can Handle My Boyfriend’s Drinking Problem

Dear T,

Point blank, what would you do if you think your boyfriend had an alcohol problem? My boyfriend and I been together for about 5 months, and over the past 2 months I realized I’m not a big fan of him drunk. I mean he’s always liked drinking the occasional drink. Hell, we met at a club. I used to think his drunken antics were a little cute. He would get very talkative, and his sex game improved ironically. Lately though, when he drinks he gets a little belligerent, and he’s drinking more frequently. In fact, we now usually get into our biggest arguments after he’s been drinking, and since he’s been doing more of that, we argue often.

I’ve asked him if he thought maybe he had a problem, but he says he doesn’t and I’m just hyping up the situation. I love my boyfriend and I want us to work out, but I don’t know if I want to deal with him and the drinking like that, and he doesn’t acknowledge a problem. So what would you do? What should I do?

-Want Him to Stop

Dating, relationships

You Fell In Love and He Cheated… How to Move on from an EX

Well this year I’ve been going through a huge transition in life and it’s all after finding out my ex cheated on me for years. Reflecting on my relationship, I did a lot to make it work and sacrificed a lot to make them happy and now seeing my energy and love was taken advantage of to make them feel better, simply sucks.  So I guess my question is “He f$cked you over, now what?

Now life has gotten a lot better for me, confidence risen, job opportunities, genuinely happy. But my hardest struggle is getting passed and over the hurt and pain, and it’s hard not reflect on the past.

-Surprisingly Broken

Dating

I Think The Guy I’m Seeing Looks at Me as Daddy and NOT Zaddy

Hey According to T.

I love the advice that you give and as I’m reading I think of the advice I would give. For once I have a dilemma of my own. I met a younger guy a few years ago on an out of town trip, he was in high school so I left it alone after I found this out. Recently he contacted me, he’s now 20 with plans on relocating to my city. We talk everyday when time between my work schedule and his school and work schedule allows us to do so. I asked him why he likes me and his response was that he’s attracted to bigger and older guys and that I’m always concerned with his well-being and would do anything for him. How should I take that as I’m not wanting to be a daddy to anyone?

Signed not your daddy

The Lifestyle

Another Moment with Euphonious K.Z.G.: Gratefulness Day 2017… What a day to remember!!

Blog #3 let’s goooooo! I really wanna talk about my actual gratefulness day with you all because it ended up being AMAZING!! So usually I’m a bit sad on holidays whether it’s from not having a companion to spend the time with cuddling and just loving each other or whether it’s the constant reminder of watching my family drift apart over the years (heartbreaking). This year I actually wasn’t down though. I was pretty content and ready to spend the day to myself, sleeping, video gaming, listening to music, and just being creative.

The Lifestyle

7 Events for the Black Gay Man’s Summer Calendar

  1. Philly Black Gay Pride (April 27-April 30)

While Philly has never been my favorite city (no offense to the folks from there), this has always been a great kickoff to pride events on the East coast. Given that the event coincides with the track and field Penn Relays, the city is full of people. Not to mention, the city is in driving distance for many people in the Northeast.

 

 

Pop Culture

Moonlight Backlash is Ridiculous

Since so many people want to talk about why they have a problem with a movie like Moonlight winning an Oscar for Best Picture, let’s talk about it shall we.  Let’s talk about this masterpiece that Barry Jenkins and Tarell Alvin McCraney created.  The movie deserved that win this past Sunday.  Hands down.  While I would have been pleased if Hidden Figures had nabbed the trophy, Moonlight’s victory means more for me as a black gay man.

The Lifestyle

Dear Straight People: Enough with the “Gay Shaming”

Dear Straight People,

It’s 2016, so in the name of progress, please stop “gay shaming.”  I’m sure some of you may be confused as to what exactly that is, so let me shed some light on the term.  You know those instances when you are in an argument with a guy and the two of you trading jabs, then you hit him with the “shut up with your gay a$$” or “stop being a queen”?  Well that’s gay shaming folks.  Or perhaps you’ve been guilty of accusing a man you don’t particularly care for of being homosexual because his voice wasn’t the deepest.  Or he took too much pride in his appearance.  Or he just wasn’t the epitome of masculinity.  For the purpose of this conversation, that’s “gay shaming.”  And to be honest, playing the “you’re gay” card is getting too old and too tired.