Dating, friendship

If He’s Not that into My Friend, Why Can’t I Date Him?

T,

It’s my first time with this so I’m hoping the advice you give will really help me out here.  I’m stuck between trying to be a good friend and trying to pursue my man.  Or at least I want him to be my man. Long story short, friend and I go to bar for happy hour.  While there, we both meet this guy at the same time. My friend and I both find him attractive, but since I’m shy and my friend is not, he winds up making play for the guy and getting his number.  While my friend’s personality is definitely bigger than mine, the guy and I clicked. Yet again, my friend got his number.  When I got home later that same night, the guy sends me a friend request and DM.  From that initial DM, the guy and I exchanged numbers, and have been talking nonstop for about a week and some change.

I recently told this guy, that he can’t try talking to me and talking to my friend at the same time.  He assures me that he hasn’t been talking to my friend like that, but my friend keeps hitting him up.  The guy showed me the text messages and it’s clear that he’s been trying to distance himself from my friend, but my friend is still in pursuit. When I asked my friend if he still talks to the guy from the bar, he says yes. But again, I know the guy is not that into him and I’ve seen it for myself.

My question for you is, what do I do?  I really do like this guy and we really just vibe. On the other hand, I have my friend who I’m not trying to hurt.

From,

The Boy Is Mine