I am in sort of a weird spot right now. Late December, I downloaded bumble for fun and got way more than I was looking for. I matched with this guy and we have been talking for three months now but have never met in person. We live in the same town where I am a full-time student and he has a 9-5 job so schedules are busy but not busy enough to justify not making time.
I have asked him to meet up a couple times and he has backed out. However, he has asked me to meet up more times but it’s only ever when he knows I already have plans. He has expressed that he really wants to meet me but “just has a very busy schedule”. I’m not sure what to make of the whole situation because I obviously want to meet him to decide how I feel about him and go from there. I enjoy talking to him but I’m not sure what to do. I feel like after three months of talking daily, I want to meet him and would have a hard time just cutting it off. I’m not sure how much I believe he wants to meet me if he hasn’t really tried or if he’s just bored and is trying to fill his time talking to me/other girls. Let me know what you think!
– Confused Pen Pal
I have a problem I don’t think you’ve written about but hoping you can help me with. I’ve been talking to this guy who I really like for about six weeks or so on IG. Not only does he have body and a great smile, but he also is sexy to me because he is smart. The conversations we have always leave me feeling a type of way if you know what I mean. As great as this guy seems though, we haven’t met in person. Every time I suggest it, he says cool, kind of flakes last minute.
Now usually, I’d tell a guy about himself and just block him. But every time I go to do that, I go through our messages and look at pics of him, and get a little hot to be honest. It doesn’t help that we’ve phone boned a couple of times, and it was sexy. And he’s seen private photos of mine and I’ve seen his, so I feel invested for some reason. My friends think I’m being dumb and being played, but part of me just feel like me and this guy could work, so I don’t want to cut him off completely. Besides, I still talk to other dudes. Could use your input.
I met a guy on Jack’d, out of all places, and we seemed to have hit it off pretty well with our exchange of non-sexual, cool-natured, and friendly messages on there. Over a span of a couple of days, our vibe was so great, that it led to us exchanging phone numbers where our conversations continued from there on. This guy had my nose wide open! He’s a good catch, good credentials, smart, funny, good heart, handsome – All the aspects most want in a guy. Interested in seeing one another, we decided to meet up in person. I suggested we’d meet up at a billiard because in my mind, it’d be a place where we can have fun, and feel each other out without the temptation of easily being lured to sex.
We agreed to meet at a reservation, overlooking the city instead, his idea, and a great one because I feel it’s an intimate and romantic “first date” so to speak. When we met, we were both giddy, obviously feeling each other and both rather shy. Our talk led to us kissing passionately and, perhaps against my better judgement, led to us getting a little frisky. All in all, it was a great night and we continued to keep in touch daily. We made plans to meet up for a second time, got stood up.
I reached out to him the next day, though he should’ve reached out to me, and he apologized with the excuse that he had taken a nap and slept through his alarm. I gave him the benefit of doubt and forgave him. He made up for standing me up by keeping his word to meet me at my place a week later. When he arrived at my place, it was the same scenario: we talked, kissed, and got a little freaky. A part of me felt like I shouldn’t have let it gone to the point of getting sexual, but my hormones were raging, and his presence and his kiss had me weak. Dammit!
And so after that event, we still continued to call/text daily, it’s about 3 weeks since we first communicated on Jack’d at this point. I thought about him e-ve-ry day! I couldn’t believe within a short time, I had an immense deep like for this man. I knew he had a Facebook, though he didn’t tell me, because I did my little research on him around the time we first started talking, as did he with me because he admitted it. So, I figured since we have chemistry and as far as I was concerned, we were cool, it wouldn’t be creepy, off-putting, or weird to send him a friend request. So I sent him one thinking at some point, he’ll see it and accept it.
In one of our daily text conversations, we brought up wanting to see each other again. He suggested that I’d meet him at his place for what would have been our 3rd time seeing each other. Of course I was thrilled about that so I sent him an affirmative response. But, when I asked for his address, he never responded back. I sent that text asking for his address on Monday, May 14th. Here we are Monday, May 21st and I still haven’t heard from him.
I suffer from the once bitten, twice shy effect to where it’s hard for me to connect with a guy in general because of my nervousness and insecurities of having been rejected time and time again. So you can imagine, since I’ve connected with this guy, I’m in shell shock, so to speak, from his sudden disappearance. I checked his Facebook profile to see if my friend request to him was still pending, not only did he not accept it, it appears as though he set it up to where I can no longer send a request. I’m a 32 years old and have never been in a relationship. My question to you is: from everything that I have explained, did I go wrong somewhere? Was there anything I did or didn’t do to warrant his abrupt cut off of communication with me?
Yes you read the title correctly. Today’s topic of discussion is about a relatively common occurrence in this day and age of dating. While you may not be familiar with the specific term “text-fishing”, if you’ve been single and looking anytime in the last 10 years or so, you more than likely have been a victim of this scam. I for one have.
I met this cool guy on Jack’d, and a few nights ago was the first time we went out. I was actually excited. When we were talking on Jack’d, I felt like we just clicked. But when we met up at the restaurant, I kept thinking I was catfished. The dude looked like the pictures he sent me, but he was so stiff and boring. The convos were stale, and I laughed only once. Who can be with someone that doesn’t make them laugh? After distancing myself from him since the date, he texted me and asked me when we were going out again. Because my dating season has been dry, I’m tempted to give him another try, just because of our past online convo. On the other hand, I don’t want to waste my time. What are your thoughts?
I know I’m not the only one that has had his fair share of weird experiences using certain dating apps and sites. And the weird experiences aren’t generated by these apps, but more so by the community of users that log into them. Just keep reading, and tell me you can’t relate. Truth be told, you may have some more you want to add to the list.