The Lifestyle

You Want a Commitment from a Man Who Won’t Commit

Dear T,

I’m starting to feel stupid. I’ve been dealing with this guy for about 4 months now, but I’m just frustrated. We have good dates, good conversations, and good sex. He just won’t commit to me. He keeps saying he likes me, but doesn’t want to be in an official relationship. Despite being with me at least 3 days a week every week, he says being in an official relationship is not something he wants to do because relationships are complicated.

I hate being in this position. He’s free to do whatever he wants, and I’m left falling in love or whatever with a guy that’s not technically mine. I know I can just walk away, but I can’t find myself doing it. How would you get this guy to boo you up?

From,

Mr. Frustrated

The Lifestyle

Being In a Long-Distance Relationship on Two Different Continents

Hey T

So I just recently moved away to a whole other continent and I have Left behind my beloved Boyfriend, we’ve been dating for a while and we’re still dating of course. We both get busy but we ALWAYS make time for each other, it’s very important to do that in a Long-distance relationship.

Like I said I’ve moved to another continent and I’m gonna be living here for 3 years or so, and my Boyfriend and I were so used to being with each other and Getting intimate all the time. We love having Sex. A lot of sex. That’s the way we are, but since I’m gonna be away for so long I’m worried that he’s gonna have sex with somebody else, and I don’t want that because I’d never move past it, I’d never forgive.  It would make me so insecure even imagining it breaks my heart, burns my chest, and blurs my eyes with tears.

We’ve talked about this multiple times, I’ve told him I’ll wait for him, I even promised because I love him but I’m scared and worried that he won’t because he’s a guy, but all he tells me is that he Loves me very much and only wants me, I don’t understand why he can’t just promise. Him not promising me gets into my head and makes me overthink and anxious.

-Hannah

The Lifestyle

5 Tips to Save You Money, Time, and Aggravation During Pride Weekend

While I know Pride Season has already technically begun, I usually don’t think it starts until DC Black Pride Weekend. Granted I might have a bias for the weekend because I’m all too familiar with the area and typical events. But, this particular pride occasion also coincides with usually warm weather and Memorial Day Weekend, so it brings all sorts of people from the LGBT spectrum out. If you’ve never been, allow me to tell you that the few days can be quite eventful.

However, the weekend can be the wrong kind of eventful under the wrong circumstances. As with all things, this particular weekend has its share of horror stories. You can probably find past participants that will claim to have been in a fight, hooked up with the wrong guy, got too drunk, lost a wallet, lost a man, and as well as been a part of a plethora of other issues.

And having myself fallen into one of the above categories, I’ve decided to give some words of advice to encourage any of you attending DC Black Pride (and really any pride this summer) to be better. Keep reading as I go over five tips to help you save money, time, and aggravation as you go out and celebrate you for being you.

friendship, The Lifestyle

My Best Friend’s Girlfriend Doesn’t Like Me Because I’m Gay

Tavion,

I’m having a problem I need your help with. Long story short, one of my best friends is a straight guy, and we’ve known each other since middle school. About four months ago he started dating this girl who I can’t stand.  When I first met her I could tell something was off about her, but I kept my feelings to myself. I really wish I hadn’t.

Since she’s been around I don’t see my friend as much, and any time I do see him she’s right there behind him like a shadow. Not only is she there, but she looks at me with this stank face like I pissed in her grits or something. I’ve come to the conclusion that she is jealous or something like I want to screw my best friend.

Keep in mind I’ve never slept with my best friend, nor have I ever wanted to sleep with him. He’s cute and is about his business, but I’ve never wanted to cross that line with him. He’s like my blood brother. He wouldn’t cross that line with me either because he is very much into women.

What do I do in this situation? The longer this woman is around, the more attached she and my friend become. I’m nervous about our friendship. I tried asking why his girl doesn’t seem to like me, but he said she doesn’t have a problem and she’s cool. I know that’s a lie.

Advice needed,

Life is Like a Box of Chocolate.

The Lifestyle

Digesting What Happened to Jussie as a Black Gay Man

I’ve been trying to figure out how to address the recent events that took place in Chicago, and I’ve been struggling to filter out my thoughts. Part of my struggle comes from knowing that Jussie is me and I’m Jussie. Strip away his fame and celebrity, and we are both Black Gay men living in the United States. I keep thinking it could have easily been me that was attacked.

Another part of my struggle comes from being angry about the situation, and not knowing how to write about my feelings in a meaningful way. This is a tough topic to navigate. While I’m not sure if I’ve been able to truly sort out of all of my thoughts in a manner that doesn’t sound like word vomit, I’ve managed to write something. So please, bear with me.

The Lifestyle

Dreams and Fulfillment: Putting Action Behind Your 2019 Resolutions

Making New Year’s Resolutions is nothing new. As a matter of fact, historians have said the Babylonians were the first to make New Year’s Resolutions roughly 4,000 years ago. Which means, for centuries upon centuries, people have used the top of the year to promise themselves better health, better wealth ,and a certain glow up they’ve yet to attain before. While I’m not sure what happened back in the days of the Babylonians, I know in this day and age, commitment to keeping resolutions has become somewhat of a running joke.

Think about it. How many people do you know that have been working on their “summer body” for about four summers? (No shade intended, because I too have been working on my summer body since 2016 myself LOL). And how many folks can you name right now that have been committed to leveling-up in their career yet have made no efforts to move out of their current job? I won’t even touch on the unfulfilled travel goals people make yet make no efforts to save money for said goals. (Again, no shade intended, but I too can relate.)

The Lifestyle

The Importance of Understanding Rejection: A 360 View of “No”

Hey there folks. Lately, I’ve felt the need to share some words of encouragement in an effort to help those feeling fatigued by the pursuit of their dreams. I’m a believer that a lot of times in life, we as humans go through situations that really test us and force to either grow or shrink. Looking back on my life, I can recall countless experiences that have helped push me to evolve. But as I’ve gotten older, and I like to think wiser, I’ve realized that the things that have happened to me on my journey in life happened not only for my own benefit of growth, but also to help someone else. That is if I’m willing to open up and transparent (which is definitely not an easy thing to do.)

The Lifestyle

Your Excuses Are Just That… Five Reasons to Vote This Election Day

Being a citizen of the United States and having this platform, I feel it’s my duty to remind you all the importance of voting in these midterm elections. If you are like me and were crushed by the abysmal turn the 2016 Presidential Election took, and loath the actions of Trump and the current political leadership, then this election cycle is not one to ignore. It simply isn’t the time not to exercise your right to vote.

Look, I’ve heard a ton of excuses as to why people don’t vote and don’t plan to do so this November. And no excuse (with the exception of death, being in a comatose state, or felony disenfranchisement) has ever been a valid reason not to vote. If you say you can’t vote because you are busy on Election Day, get an absentee ballot or vote early on a day where you have free time. If you’re a person that doesn’t vote because you don’t want to be called for jury duty, know that a survey taken states only 27% of the entire U.S. population has ever served on a jury. (If you’re a person of color and feel this way about jury duty, think about the innocent black and brown folks who go to jail because they were convicted by people that don’t look like them. Or think about individuals who get off for taking black and brown lives because black and brown folks like you won’t serve.)

The worst excuse I hear when it comes to why people don’t vote is, “my vote won’t matter” or “my vote won’t change anything.” This excuse annoys me because millions of people use it, equating to millions of non-votes. For those using this excuse, allow me to present five things currently at stake, and why voting is important this go around.

The Lifestyle

Don’t Allow Unsupportive Family to Steal Your Joy

Hello, Mr. Scott,

“Excuse for all of my last minute gush and lengthy expression”

I have been in a life long battle since I was 9 years old, which I’m 22 years old now where I live in small loop of life is home, school, and church. It’s killing me. It’s about my identity as Demisexual and mundane problems.

To me, demisexual is very unique, not as popular as LGBTA (saying that in humble way), and it fit my whole personality ever since. I am the type of person who love reading books, exploring things with high curiosity, funny, introvert, open minded, bubbly, go getter, be a “fresh air and be an organic food” for people (myself too since we all been through hard life out there), look inside of people’s soul and personality instead of their appearance, which makes extremely hard for me to attract toward woman or man, and get bored easily with things.

I was born and raised in black family who is very strong and strict in Christian who make everything black and white…no gray in between, which I find it funny that I tend to find colors in “between” is almost an answer for everything without conflicts, an answer for people haven’t thought of, and use it to help people to be free. When I first came out to them after graduating college, it took me many years to open myself up and ended up being bashed by them.

At first, they stare at me like I’m an alien or pure confusion and say confusion is from the devil. I ended up destroying myself to see them be happy for me but noticed my health is crashing, my daily drawing for my outlet becoming depressing, very few, or on hold for long time, overthinking is eating me up so much of what to be as “worldly” or “not worldly” in every little things I do and say, which my silence is getting bigger, while my action is getting smaller every day.

I personally hate to be limited or being twisted, yet I’m living under parent’s roof where parent are recently separated. Parents are so into my business and nearly ruin everything I build for my future, even I want my life to be private and be truly me. Still looking for job. So, I never had relationship (I have one but got cheated on, so I’ll say I never had relationship 😂) and it very difficult for me to open up to anyone and about to put my mindset on “business” mode without emotions to get through everything. My goal is to be artist as animator, illustrator, making tv show, entrepreneur, and massage therapist. I feel like I have more than that….I know it is a lot since I love multitasking to keep my mind going and make money overflowing. Again, I apologize for lengthy expression!!

-Strawberry Prince

The Lifestyle

Dear RHOA… Accusing Someone of Being Gay to Be Shady is Actually Offensive to Fans

Before I dive deep into this post, let me just mention a few disclaimers.  First and foremost, this is not a personal attack on anyone. If anything, I hope to make this a teaching moment, and not a “reading” lesson.  Secondly, I’m not professing to be Team Nene, Team Twirl, or any other team affiliated with the show. I have no metaphorical horse in this race.  While I admittedly don’t like the consistent actions of a few, my personal feelings for the ladies, or the images they portray, has nothing to do with what I’m about to go into here.  And lastly, my words can be applied beyond The Real Housewives of Atlanta franchise, and Bravo TV.  So let’s get to it.