Dating, relationships

Dating Someone that Won’t Give Up the Goods

Dear T,

I started talking to this guy about two weeks ago, and while on a date this past weekend he revealed to me he is celibate.  And he plans to be that way until he has been dating a person for at least 6 months.  As someone that happens to really like sex, I asked him some follow up questions.  First, I wanted to know if that meant just penetration sex or everything.  He said ideally it meant everything but kissing, hugging, and a little groping every now and then.  I then asked him if six months was a definite time span or was he flexible.  The guy claimed he wasn’t really flexible with the six months.  Which leaves me in this bind.  I like the dude, a lot actually, but six months is a long damn time without penetration.  Especially if I’m not getting any oral play either.   Hell, a person can only play with own meat so many times before it gets old. What would you do in this situation?

Sincerely,

Not a Hoe, Just a Man

Dating, relationships

Where is My Boo?

T I’m just going to jump right into this.   I’m sick of being single, and I’m tired of being what my cousin calls a serial dater.  I thought about this last night, and I haven’t been in a real relationship in almost 3 years.  And hell, my last relationship lasted a whopping 4 months.  What is it going to take for me to get a bae?  I have great career, nice place to live, and like to think I’m cute.  Definitely not a boogawolf.  And don’t really have hard time getting men to the bed.  Just a hard time keeping them there longer than a few weeks.  Hoping you can help me out with some words of wisdom or whatever to land a man.  Oh and FYI, I already asked my friends what they think I’m doing wrong.  They basically said, “man you’re a good catch, the perfect guy is out there for you.”  My response was “B$tch where?” Anyway, any help would be appreciated.

Thanks in advance,

Booless in the City.

relationships, The Lifestyle

The Mama Don’t Like Me

Dear T,

Last week I met my boyfriend’s mother for the first time.  Going into the meeting with her, I had high hopes that I would meet her and she would love me.  I mean most parents do.  But instead, she just threw me shade, and without saying so, she made sure I knew she didn’t care for me.  I asked my boyfriend what I did to offend her, but he says his mom just has to warm up to me.   Honestly, I’ve never heard that before.  I’m 29, have a college degree, a good job, my own place, and have a lot to offer.  And yet she doesn’t like me.  I thought maybe she didn’t like me because she doesn’t like the fact her son is gay, but my boyfriend says his mom has accepted his sexuality.  Oh and I was the first guy he has introduced as his boyfriend to his mother.   What are your thoughts?

Sincerely,

Charles No Barkley

relationships

Am I Stuck on Stupid?

Dear T,

I have a problem.  I’m in still in love with my ex, and I want him back.  We broke up about a year ago because he cheated on me.  When I found out what he did I was devastated, and couldn’t talk to him for a minute.  But over the past month, we’ve started talking again, and the feelings between us are still there.  Am I stupid to want to be with him again?

Sincerely,

Stupid in Love

Dating, relationships

Can I Tell Him He’s Bad in Bed?

Hey T,

Straight and to the point, how do you tell someone you’re dating they are bad in bed?  Been dating this guy for about a month now, and a few days ago we had sex for the first time.  He is extremely sexy, great personality, and very real, so I want us to work out.  But I don’t know if I can be with someone that is terrible at pleasuring me.  Thanks in advance for the advice.

Anonymously,

Jeffrey Doe

Dating, relationships, The Lifestyle

I’m Gay, He’s Bisexual, Can We Work?

Dear T,

I want to start dating this guy I met about 3 weeks ago, but I’m just a little nervous about doing it.  Since we’ve been texting back and forth, I’ve really come to like him.  But, I found out that he is bisexual.  I know people claim to like both men and women, but I just haven’t bought into that idea.  You either like men or you like women.  You may be willing to sleep with both sexes, but you have a definitive preference for one or the other.  So I guess my hesitation in dating this guy, is that he is still confused as to who he is.  I’d rather not waste my time helping him to figure that out.  Do you think I should date him or not?

Sincerely,

MeekFan89

Dating, relationships, The Lifestyle

Who Picks Up the Check?

Dear T,

Quick question for you.  I’m a man and I’ve started dating men, but I’m slightly confused about the gay dating protocol.   Since we are two men, who pays when we go out?  I mean when I was dating women, I usually would pay because I grew up thinking that was the gentlemen thing to do.  Anyway, your advice is appreciated.

From,

Adam4Adam’90

Dating, relationships

Living Single…And I Want to Stay that Way!

 Dear T,

I’m going to try and be brief about this. Unlike all of my friends, I’m not in a relationship nor do I desire to be in one.  I enjoy my independence, and like being able to be with whoever I want, no strings attached.  But my friends just can’t accept I don’t want an official boo. I did the relationship thing, and I don’t miss it. This all brings me to my question. Is not wanting a relationship normal, and okay?

Thanks in advance,

King Kunta11

Dating, relationships

Stay True to You! You Owe It to You and Your Boo!

 Dear According to T,

I’ve been looking for this person who would bring me back to a place of loving that I recently lost. I think I’ve found him. We laugh together, share personal moments, and have been intimate once, which was amazing. Here’s my personal war, he’s very plugged into social issues and is very liberated in his thinking.  He identifies as queer, loves drag (and does it), and is not dogmatic.  In recent months, I’ve learned that my belief system is shifting and I enjoy whimsical faith. He makes me feel free, but at times I feel his thinking is light years beyond my own and I worry that I’m shallow, even though he doesn’t see me that way. Should I try to plug myself in more to political and social issues just to be able to keep up with him?

Thanks,
Questioning Queer

relationships

Hop Off His Ride So You Can Think!

Dear T,

I think I’m addicted to my ex-boyfriend/current boyfriend depending on the day.  We have been off and on for about 3 and half years now.  We will be good for about 2 months, and then all of a sudden he will do something that pisses me off and cause me to want to break up with him.  I mean he’s lied to me, cheated on me, and he can be so immature sometimes.  However, he also makes me laugh like no other, and he has given me some of the best surprises I’ve ever received.  Plus, the sex with him is beyond amazing.  I mean I’ve been with other guys, but none of them even come close to this man in the bedroom.  My friends say great surprises and mind blowing sex aren’t everything, and if me and the ex break up as often as we do, maybe I should move on.  But I can’t bring myself to let him go.  Say I move on and find another guy that doesn’t cheat, is mature, and always treats me right, but the sex is terrible.  I think if I work with the ex and help him grow up a little, I will have my perfect man.  Please tell me what you think?

Dream Catcher89