A friend of mine suggested I come here after you helped her out with her problem. I recently found out that my boyfriend has been having me out here looking stupid. Apparently when he’s had me hanging around his group of friends, he’s been having me hang around someone he used to smash. My boyfriend and I have been together for 8 months, and I just found out he and one of his friends used to smash. What’s even sadder is I found out a week ago at a kickback when another one their friends mentioned something while playing Never Have I Ever.
I kept a straight face at the kickback, but when my boyfriend and I got in the car I ripped into him. I just felt stupid. He said he didn’t think it was a big deal because it was a long time ago, and is not interested in his friend. But I feel a way. He’s since apologized, but I’m still pissed. I don’t want to bring up again, but I really want to bring it up again. What do you think?
-Man on Fire
What do you do when you finally land your crush and it’s not what you thought it would be? Getting straight to the point, before this whole corona thing popped off, I had a crush on this guy who I’m now dating. For about three months, I would see him at the gym when I went and would find myself so damn thirsty. He has body. So towards the end of January, I finally listened to my friends and spoke with him. And from then on, I got to know more about him and found he was cool. We’ve been dating, have some amazing sex, but there’s an issue with our conversations. I feel like our conversations aren’t great.
We talk about working out, sports, and Marvel movies a lot. Initially that was cool, but when I want to talk politics, or Bravo shows, or cultural issues, or other types of movies, our conversations are a little blah. And maybe because all this quarantining has us spending more and more time together, but I’m a little bothered by our limited talks. Not sure if I’m making a big deal out of nothing or if I was a bit shallow in trying to date him. Not sure if there is a question in there, but I’m sure you can find it.
Blinded by the Muscles
Point blank, I’m not a fan of my friend’s boyfriend. I feel like this old man kinda controls my friend, he’s 34 and she’s 23. Take for example the fact he tried to check her once about her hair. Apparently, he’s not a fan of braids, and let it be known by telling her that braids didn’t look nice on her and she shouldn’t get them anymore. Plus, she pays for almost everything in the relationship. Oh and since she started seeing this guy, she hates going to the club.
I know I shouldn’t get in the middle of someone’s relationship, but I felt I had to. I told her as nicely as I could to stop letting him control her, and she says he’s not. I didn’t want to push too hard because I’m nervous she would try to bail on me, but I want my friend back. What should I do here?
– King Kunta
I did something I regret, and I want to fix it. I am in a long-distance relationship with my boyfriend of 8 months. However, I kinda hurt him when I hooked up with one of his friends. I did not mean to. It was in the heat of the moment because this friend is mutual. I told him about it because we are the type to be honest with each other. I feel rotten and I don’t deserve him or to be loved. We are on a break now so he can sort himself out. I want to change. I cry every day and I miss him so much. I want to clean up myself and show him that I am sorry. I just do not know what to do, but know it’s his decision this time. How do I go about this?
What does it mean when a guy tells you he likes you and wants to build something with you, but he then goes ghost. He’s ghosted me more than once. Long story short, this guy who I’ve been dating for about 3 months is so up and down. One week we’re talking every day with texts and calls, and the next week he may text me 4 times over 7 days. When I asked him what the deal was, he said work gets stressful sometimes, but he doesn’t mean to offend. Said he is working toward a relationship with me, but his disappearing act pisses me off. But he has time to like Ig photos, not that I’m stalking him. What should I do here?
I’m having a major issue with my fiancé. We have been together for about a year and a half. We got engaged and bought a house together. At the beginning, when we started dating, I asked him if he had kids. To which he said yes 2 girls. After some months of dating, I got to meet them. They are wonderful girls and I love them like my own. Everything has been going great until yesterday.
As we sat to have dinner, he exposed his secret and lie all at once. He told me he had a son as well. He said he has no contact with him but he paid all of his child support till he turned 21 last year. Well I got so upset with him about this because I feel that he betrayed my trust by not telling me about him from day one when I asked him if he had kids. And he knew about him from the time his ex was pregnant with him, so it’s not like he just found out. This lie/secret is really taking a toll on me.
Now I’m wondering what else he is hiding. I don’t think I can ever trust him again. That was something he should have told me before we got engaged and moved in together. We have even been trying to conceive to have a little one of our own but now it’s like I don’t even know him. I, of course, flipped out on him for not telling me to the point we were down each other throats about it, especially when he found it funny that I was mad at him for this and he laughed in my face.
He doesn’t care how this has affected me. I don’t care that he has more kids. I wouldn’t care before either. It’s the fact that he lied about it and kept it a secret from me. Well our argument got so bad he broke up with me. I am lost for words and don’t know what do think. Why did he do that? Why tell me about the 2 daughters but not about his son? I just don’t get it. And then at the end break up with me because I got angry about it. Like seriously, he messed up and punished me for his mistake by breaking up with me.
I need some advice. I’m in a fairly new relationship with this guy who I honestly do love, a lot. But I’m nervous about our sex life going forward. See I’m a top that doesn’t mind playing the other role in a committed relationship. The problem is, not only does my boyfriend not really enjoy the experience of bottoming, I don’t think he can satisfy me as a top.
It’s hard for me to be thrilled about actual sex knowing he doesn’t like bottoming, and it’s visible when we’re in the act. Our sex life isn’t a huge problem now, but I’m nervous it will be.
Wanting to Be Pleased
My boyfriend and I started our relationship when I was overseas in February, so basically our relationship does not have a stable foundation. I had to go overseas for studies this whole year, I left in January and will be back in April next year. I recently found out that he cheated on me in April when I was looking through his phone messages, he was very intimate with another girl but this whole time he says that he never had sex with her even though the slept on the same bed a few times. He said he broke it off as he felt that it was not right or that he was starting to develop feelings for her, I don’t remember.
It was very rocky for us back in April, we kind of broke up and kept arguing but finally got back together as he had a scheduled trip to visit me in May, he booked the flights back in February. I forgave him, decided to give him another chance but within the last few days, I found he cheated again in November. He only said it was a bj, but I don’t believe that, because his message to his friend was that the girl said that there was no need to use protection, so to me, they did have sex, or else he would not have said that to his friend, no matter what he says.
He also made out with another girl twice around the same period of time, I found out all of this through his messages to his friend. It was him who gave me his password to his social media accounts, as I found out that he was lying to me recently, hence, I have no trust in long-distance relationships so he gave it to me when I asked for it.
Another thing is that he is extremely flirtatious with girls, just too intimate for my liking. I have spoken to him about it and he said that he will change. But the problem is him cheating so many times, like I just can’t accept it. But after mentioning breaking up he told me his reason of being like this, he said he used to be a very loyal person, but because of his ex he turned out this way. He said his ex used to bring guys back to her apartment all the time and was very intimate with other guys when he was dating her, so he thought and believed that he could do the same as well. After confronting him, he said that he regrets it, he just does not know how to reject people which i believe is bullshit. But he said he is willing to change, to give it a fresh start and to really appreciate me this time.
He deleted all of his Instagram messages (which is where I found all this info from), wanting to start anew, he swears that he will change and that he does not want to break up with me. My friends all tell me that a guy who cheats will never change, which I believe, but I also believe in giving people one more chance. But the problem is that I found out about him cheating within a 2 week span this month, I thought I gave him a chance for his cheating in April but now I find out about another one in November.
I really don’t know what I should do, if I can trust him? None of my friends support us together, none of them believe in cheaters. He was bowing on the ground for me to give him another chance, he keeps apologizing, he really regrets it but words have no effect anymore. He said that he will use time to prove it to me, but I don’t know how he will prove it. Just a little background, he works in a bar, so he meets girls on a daily basis. Which I don’t mind as long as he knows how to draw the line, but clearly he does not. He said from now on he will go straight home after work, he won’t have supper with his friends anymore, he said that he will stay at home with me when he has his days off. He said that he will change, he will do anything to not break up, but I really don’t know what to do right now, I am really confused. Please help me.
I need advice on how to get over/get my mind off of something that my boyfriend did before we were dating.
My boyfriend of five months just recently told me that he has sent nudes (pictures and videos) to over 100 people. This is in a span of a few years before we have been together, up to right before we started getting serious. He told me this less than a week ago, and it’s something that I have not been able to stop thinking about. It is changing the way I view him and act toward him.
I knew he had sent nudes in the past. Right when we became ‘official, he scrolled past a folder in his phone that had countless nude pictures and videos of other men. He deleted the folder and I trust that he is not sending nudes anymore. The thing that bothers me most is that: 1) so many people have seen such a sensitive part of him, 2) if he sent it to that many people, odds are that there is some content of him online and still in the hands of many people, and 3) these people still follow him on social media, know who I am from his posts, and know that we are together.
I have never been one to openly send nudes to people, so I just don’t understand why he would want to do that to so many, even when single. The other day even, I scrolled past a nude photo of someone I don’t know on Twitter, and it turns out he has exchanged nudes with that person. That made it settle in for me how many people I might or might not come in contact with, that has seen him like that.
I really want to continue this relationship. He makes me happy, he is patient and understanding with me and I believe I can trust him. I want to continue this relationship, but I don’t want to keep being miserable and keep thinking about how many people he has sent nudes to.
Your advice would be greatly appreciated
My boyfriend and I have been in a long-distance relationship for almost 3 years now. We have known each other since 2015. Recently I found out that he has been cheating on me for almost 8 months, during which time we were on a break for about 20 days or so. He’s apologized and told me that it was the distance and that there is no excuse that could cover him cheating. He says he was going to tell me this January when I would go over to meet him. He says he loves me and that he is willing to show me that he can change and that he will do whatever he can to change my opinion about him. I’m conflicted about whe….