Like many of you this past weekend, I enjoyed experiencing true British royalty. I’m speaking of Queen Adele of course. 25 is an amazing follow up to the record breaking 21. Having listened to her latest project in its entirety a few times, and loved every track, I’m honestly having a hard time picking a favorite song. If I had to narrow it down though, I’d put “I Miss You,” “Water Under the Bridge,” and “Sweetest Devotion” at the top of my list. But trust, it was a little difficult to choose just three. Although I could talk about this album all day, today’s post is really about Adele’s big concept behind it. The common thread of 25 in my opinion is really the idea of closure.
Over the course of your life, you will hopefully get to experience a real relationship with real love and with a real boo. The type of relationship that makes you want to listen to every love song and have you smiling just because. But if you experience such a thing at least once, then you will probably encounter the pain of a breakup. You know the kind of pain that has you under eating, has you crying and in your emotional bag, and has you cooped up in your bedroom under a ton of blankets. Feel free to insert your “I know that’s right,” or “yep that’s it,” or “been there done that.” LOL!
Once you’ve been through the romance, and fallen victim to the pain, then if you’re fortunate you will reach a place of closure. Despite what people may think, closure doesn’t necessarily come when two people decide to end things. Yeah the relationship may be over, but until a person no longer wonders about the answers to questions like “why did we break up,” or “what if we try again,” or “what if he is really the one,” then a person can’t effectively move on.
And let me clear, closure may not actually come in the form of a conversation with your ex. While that would be nice and simple, that won’t always be an option individuals have. Some exes will cower at the thought of having an honest conversation about why a relationship didn’t work and owning their part in the breakup. As such is the case, sometimes closure will require you to go deep in thought, do some soul searching, and reach some conclusions. (By the way, this requires honesty with yourself.)
I’d like to mention, that closure could occur within a few weeks of breakup, or maybe even a few years. Heck it took me a few years to reach a place where I was finally over my “first”. To give you a little insight, he and I were involved for over a year in a situationship. Well due to a series of misunderstandings we called it quits. But years after we ended things, we would communicate every now and then flirting with the idea of giving “us” a real go. And heck, I could be dating someone or vice versa, and we would both still be caught in this magnetic pull to each other. However, it wasn’t until we had a long conversation over the phone that I reached a state of closure. That I realized that while I’ll care about him, I just don’t love him in that way and we aren’t compatible.
With all that said, as Black Friday approaches I hope some of you reading this will put one thing on your gift list. Closure of course. Whether you are getting some or giving some, put it on the list. LOL! Prepare to go into 2015 with a clean slate and different mindset. And if you haven’t got the new Adele album, go get that too.
As always nothing but love,