The Lifestyle

Dear Straight People: Five Misconceptions about Gay Men

  1. The Term “The Gays” Is Not Offensive

I don’t care what The Real Housewives of Wherever may show on TV, saying “the gays” is extremely offensive.  Every time I hear something like “the gays know how to throw a good party,” or “the gays always keep me fabulous,” or “I love the gays,” I cringe.  It’s almost like someone saying “the Blacks,” or “the Jews,” or “the Latinos.”  Listen, the SGL (same gender loving) community is as diverse as any other community.  We don’t all like the same things.  While it is understandable some individuals may have limited their perception of gay men to those that run in their inner circle, these individuals are not justified in making sweeping generalizations about this population group, or referring to its members as if they were pandas in the local zoo.

  1. Feminine Pronouns and Nicknames are Acceptable for Every Man

Again, despite what the media tells you, not all gay men like to be called feminine pronouns and nicknames.  Some men don’t like to be called girl, hunty, Miss thang, she, her, or b*tch.  And do you know why that is?  It’s simple really.  Gay men, are still men.  They may have an attraction to guys like straight women, but that doesn’t negate their sexuality.

Look, I understand some of you might be confused because you hear men in the homosexual community refer to each other as some of those things I mentioned.  But it’s kind of like the use of the big “N-word” within the black community.  An outside member of that community that ignorantly calls someone of that diaspora that word, you better believe people will take exception.  As they should.  Moral of this story, don’t refer to a gay man as anything other than a man unless he tells you otherwise.  Oh and the same rule does NOT apply for the “N-word.”

  1. Athletics Is a Foreign Concept

It’s funny when people who know I’m gay are stunned to find out I love watching basketball and actually know the onscreen personalities on ESPN.  It may even be funnier when people who don’t know I’m gay are not pressed to believe I like men, because I love watching basketball and actually know the onscreen personalities on ESPN.  You would think with the various athletes starting to step out of the closet, that people would stop thinking that homosexual men can’t like what is traditionally deemed as “masculine.”  Hear ye hear ye, I’m a gay man and I like “manly” things!  LOL! And there are many just like me.  We aren’t like the mythical unicorns of the world.

  1. Gay Men Desperately Want to be Paired with the Only Other Gay Man You Know

Although I’m sure most mean well, straight friends of gay men should stop trying to play match maker.  I understand there are folks out here that think “what’s the harm in hooking my single gay friend up with this gay person I know from work or from my favorite restaurant?”  Well there is no harm in it, as long as you think the paring is a good paring based on something other than the common sexual preference they share.  Two gays don’t make a right! (Perhaps a failed attempt at a joke, but still applies.)  Members of the SGL community have their character preferences in a mate just like heterosexual people do.

  1. Standards Are Pretty Much Nonexistent

Piggy backing on point two, homosexual men have standards people!  We don’t want to bang every person with a penis.  I’m speaking to those straight guys that think every gay man wants them.  Not to sound mean, but if heterosexual women don’t find you attractive, why would you think I or any other gay man would?  And to the some heterosexual married women out here, there is no mass conspiracy to steal your boyfriend or husband, and convert him into one of us.  That’s simply ridiculous.  Are there gay men that will try to take your man? Sure.  But there are women out here ready to do the same thing.  However, don’t make wide assumptions about all SGL men in this regard.  Quite a few of us respect relationship boundaries, and taken men are outside our standards.

And FYI. There are Gay Christians

I’ve said it time and time again, homosexuals are not the enemy of Christianity.  I for one love the Lord and have a solid relationship with Him.  And trust me when I say, there are countless LGBT individuals that also have a relationship with Jesus.

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11 thoughts on “Dear Straight People: Five Misconceptions about Gay Men”

  1. Jo Jo says:


  2. Team Cookie says:

    Thank You LOL

    1. According To T says:

      Lol welcome. But thank you for reading

  3. Hugo No Boss says:

    I do NOT like being called ” Miss Honey Girl ” by women who don’t know me. You got this so right!

    1. According To T says:

      thanks Hugo No Boss, I appreciate that. And I would hate Miss Honey Girl myself.

  4. MrAwesomen says:

    Its a lady at work that calls me honeybun….. I’m like….Really? Honeyhun?…..iHate it!

    1. According To T says:

      I’m glad you can relate to this list. Show her this list lol

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